Women: Are We Happy or Unhappy? Part 2

Teenage Family Using Gadgets Whilst Eating Breakfast Together In KitchenIn part 1, you took a personal survey of where you are in your own life in terms of your happiness.  Now you know where you are and that is a very good thing, because now that you have a starting point you can move forward.  It things are wonderful and life is glorious for you, then go out there and teach someone else how to do what you do and spread the joy!

One of the terms, I introduced you to in part 1 was “Values Stretch”.  This is a sociology term which roughly means this:  when people (men, women, and their families) are forced (through circumstances, events of their own making or imposed on them, or natural circumstances such as disasters) to behave in ways that contradict their values.  This is a description of Values Stretch.  All of us are launched into adulthood from our childhood homes, some with great fanfare, others are kicked out at 18 and never look back, while still others have one or both parents holding on to their heels crying not willing to let their child leave the nest and try his/her wings.  At some point in this process of growing up we each develop an “original expectation, a goal, or an idea”   of what we “expect” our life to look like, sound like, feel like, etc. once we get that job, find that place to call our own, begin the relationship, and truly settle into the life we always dreamed of.

iStock_000013291363XSmallWhen reality comes calling, many of us are not equipped to to navigate these waters. Our values may not have been tested and proofed yet, we may not have had enough time to discern, take in the all the parameters and make the critical decisions necessary that are needed.  When the “values stretch” hits, we are forced into behavior which is foreign to us, and this in turn causes us to make snap decisions that can have long lasting consequences.  We cave to demands in the moment and accommodate so as not be the target.  In today’s blurred life, both professional and personal we “re-act” to everything, quite frankly because we are not given the time to “think” about our response.  In other words we are just “getting by”.  This isn’t living much less thriving.

iStock_000010873641XSmallWhat is the outcome of such a life?  Look around you, what do you see?  This type of environment breeds contempt for anyone in a position of authority.  Polls now show the discontent of the American public with ALL politicians at all levels and All political parties at an ALL TIME HIGH!  “Values Stretch”.  No one wants to be forced into something.  We want to be represented.  In the workplace this lack of flexibility leads to tearing families apart, the health of all parties deteriorates (there is simply no time left in the day much less week to relax, or have fun if you are working this hard, and running from one thing to another), resentment arises between partners over responsibilities at home and work, appreciation for work performed at home and in the workplace, and workplace performance deteriorates.

What do you think?

What does you life look like?

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