The Sweet Smell of Success

Congratulations!!!!   You have just tasted success!

For the past few weeks we have just walked through what I typically do with my clients in the process of awareness, growth and now freedom.  This final step in the process is what I believe to be the most important part and that is tasting the sweetest part of the process.   Far too often when a compliment is given it is dismissed, disregarded, or deflected and not taken in.   Not in my coaching practice.  If a client dares to do any one of these three, they are stopped cold and we circle back and the compliment is given again. Clear instruction is given as to what the process is:  look me in the eye, breath, say “Thank you, and then mentally deposit the compliment.

Something wonderful happens when a person “gets this”!  I have observed it over and over again.  Their very body language changes.  They straighten up like a Marine.  They sit up straight, their chest lifts up, their eyes widened, a smile comes over their face and if you listen very, very carefully, you will hear a cha-ching in their internal cash register when the deposit happens.

Try it for yourself and see what happens.

If you are a person who routinely deflects and brushes off compliments and wonders why you don’t feel good about what you are doing, it might just be that you are the problem, because you aren’t allowing the deposits to be made.  After a  while no one will bother to even say anything.  If you find that to be the case,  think back about your own behavior.

This is a great lesson for parents as well.  Remember you are a role model every moment of the day and night.  Little eyes and ears are always watching and listening even when you think they are not and they will model what you teach and what you do not teach.

Everyday is a new day that you can find something good the compliment someone for something and be sincere about it.  Everyone has something that they do well.  Be sincere and build them up.  When a person is dry like a desert, it takes a whole lot of water for the flowers to bloom.  So be patient.  Keep making those deposits and watch their body language.  Keep smiling internally and watch for the times when you can add too those compliments.  They will start believing in themselves as well.  If you can take a short cut in your own appearance or take a mere 30 seconds more, take the 30 and see how much better you feel about yourself.  It will show in your body language.

It doesn’t take any more time to be upbeat and positive as it does to be nasty and critical.

 

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