The Finish Line Part 1

Everyone knows what the finish line is all about – in one word – “Completion”.

Every day we cross many finish lines and some go by unnoticed by us, while others loom big on the horizon and then hit us like a ton of bricks.

One of the first personal finish lines for me was graduating from High School.  Now for some reason I thought things would magically change on that day and as I look back at those couple of photos that were taken that day, I see a different end to what I thought was going to be a glorious beginning.

What about you?  What do you recall as your personal first finish line?

Later on when I became a Mom, I remember the finish line in the delivery room when I gave birth to our first child, I screaming, painful finish line and then suddenly no pain but rather a baby drawing in her first breath and seemingly convulsing at the freedom now free of tight confinement and the bright light where before all was dark and the startling cold vs the toasty quarters of the past 9 months.

Even now the finish line of day to day parenting has long past but the memories of that finish line are still present in the rooms that our children once occupied and the space that they once lived in, in our daily lives is still all around us in the form of photos.

Do you remember when the “finish line” of your summer vacation was over?  Just pick any summer vacation; what was that like?

How did you feel?

There are painful finish lines and exciting finish lines.  You either love them or hate them.  For those who do not wish to confront their feelings about their finish lines you will here things like: “…it is what it is…..or……it is just another day in my life…..or…….it is the next step in my life, and I will deal with it….”   We call that denial.

If you are sad about a finish line; it is OK to grieve the ending of a season of life before you begin the next one.

Here’s something that I do personally that helps me as a mother.  If I find myself overwhelmed with sadness,   I make sure that I am alone at home for 1 hour.   Then I walk the floors from one end to another and grieve the lost full out.  I cry, I yell, I express myself in all the fullness of the grief that I am feeling at that very moment of the loss (crossing the finish line) and I touch, I hold, I dwell on whatever is left there.  I do not chastise myself, I let my feelings out and flow freely.

It is a strange thing, at some point, I am finished.  The feeling of “loss” is over and I can move to the next thing.

Yes, when I go into a room with memories, I say to myself that:  “…boy, I miss……or …..I love you and miss you…..” and then I get on with the business at hand.

What finish lines will you cross today?