Intimate Relationships: What do you believe?

Each of us has several “intimate relationships”.   The biggest, deepest and most intimate is the one between the outside you that you project to the world and the inside one which no one sees or feels but you. Yes, this is the most important relationship that you have in life; the one with yourself.

How are you liking yourself  and your relationship with yourself today, right at this moment?   If you are anything like me, there are days when you are very happy, sometimes even proud at your finished work at the end of your day and then there are those days when you are down right disgusted and depressed with how the day has turned out.  It is my experience that this is typical and normal.

I am a big fan of the leadership author and speaker John Maxwell and everyday he sends out a 2 minute video and recently his video was all about “complacency”.    It hit me right between the eyeballs!  John spoke about how we get to complacency, what it does to the inside of us and how to spot it in our own lives.   Boy, did he hit the bulls eye for me!

Like many of you reading this; I am in a spot of transition.  This is a very good transition and yet inside this crowded body of “me, myself and I” we are all going in three different directions and feeling three different things and we are getting nothing done and all three of us have settled into this place of complacency.  Where we are saying:  “….this and no more….”  Our goal is to just survive until tomorrow when something may take place or not, so we will putts around and the day will fly by and we will look back over the day while our head is on the pillow and say:  “……what a waste, why didn’t you do something, anything….what are you waiting for….?”    Sound familial?

I was speaking with a colleague about how we get stuck internally about this recently and he told me sometimes we just get stuck in “over thinking” mode and we can’t exit.    He is right.  So how do we exit and get a healthy intimate relationship inside ourselves with the three of us?

First, recognize that you are stuck in this mental cycle.

Second, when you have gone through your cycle once, look beyond it and look at one thing that you can do; no matter how minor or insignificant it may seem, and complete it.  This might just do the trick.  This isn’t something that you need to be on a therapist couch for a year for, it is just moving one small tick beyond insanity internally.

Third, every time you find yourself circling the drain for the third or fourth time, look up and out into the world, literally, outside your window, or better yet, put on your coat and go outside and walk around the block your building or your house and keep looking a long way in front of you to disconnect that circle and decide to come back in and do one small thing to break the cycle.

If you stay in the cycle you are already dying inside.    I personally want you around so I can lift you up and keep sharing things with you weekly.

What do you believe about your intimate relationship with yourself?



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