Intimate Relationships: What do you believe?

This is a loaded topic and there are as many opinions about it as there are people on earth, I would like to take another look at this most important of all our relationships in a new light.

I would really like you to think about the most important person in the world to you.     Get a mental image or pull a photo of the person out right in front of you.    Got it?

Now as you gaze into their eyes, look at the shape of their face, the color of their lips, how their hair lays on their head or how there may be no hair there, close your eyes and take a deep long inhalation and smell them.     I bet your mouth has turned into a big smile and you may get a warm feeling or a little jump in your heart rate.   That is what is real in your life, right at this moment.   This person is precious.  This person brings something very special into your life.  Just feel how much power they have and they aren’t even there.

Intimate relationships need to be cultivated daily or they die.  Intimate relationships must be respected.   If you hold on too tightly you strangle the very thing you love the most and drive them away to get free for a breath of fresh air.   Intimate relationships take time to nurture and develop.  There are steps, there is a process, when things are rushed, or steps are skipped, fulfillment is close behind, mistakes are made, feelings are hurt, there are expectations that are assumed which have not played out nor been spoken as of yet all leading to a steep downward spiral.

It is my observation and experience with clients that both parties are usually at fault.   We become blinded in the moment or with the help of other stimulants and the rosie glow turns dark and foreboding.

We shelter ourselves, build walls, make up agreements and stories about everything and we become “professional victims” in our intimate relationships.  We begin to fabricate real lies about who we are and what we look like.

Match.com states that 1 in 5 relationships begin on line for those ages 21 to 65.   That tells me that people are desperate of connection and they will try anything to get it, even portraying themselves as someone they are not.

With our hands off approach to interpersonal relationships, opting for the technology we not employ 24-7 it’s no wonder that relationships are in a state of decline and we are all searching desperately to connect.
Let’s go back to our famous questions and you answer honestly now…..it’s just you and technology here.

What do you believe about “Intimate Relationships”?

Where did you get that belief?

How does that belief serve you, fulfill you and lift you up today in your life?

If the answers are my intimate relationships do not not fulfill me, they do not lift me up nor do they serve me in a positive way TODAY…..then, maybe you might want to explore your belief.

No one is forcing you to  stay in the relationship, only you can do that.

Only you can step out and re-evaluate what you want and do not want.

You are 100% responsible for what you believe, and how you live your life .

 

 

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