Fried Experience or Joyful Celebration

I am actually happy to say that I mute all frenzied advertisements on TV forever.    They leave me confused, putting tissue in my ears and they are anything but a feast for my eyes.  Black Friday,   why would you subject yourself to such torture over a purchase?  Perhaps it is the need to be a part of humanity in the throws of something.   Are you looking to get a “RUSH” out of the frenzied experience?  I just don’t get it.   The same effect is seen on December 26th.    Another day of frenzied, crying frustrated shopper trying to do ….. what?

Here’s what I know, if the giving of the gift is perceived as a job you have to do; then do not do it.

The gift is suppose to be given with thoughtfulness and is something that the person would not purchase for themselves or that they perhaps need in order to lift them up in spirit.  It is wrapped in love and presented with the reward being seeing the joy it brings to the recipient.

If this is not your experience, then you are truly out of sync with things.   Your are following the frenzied marketing of the stores which are not looking for the same thing you are at all.   Marketing and copy writing and sales techniques have never in our history been so important and plugged into your subconscious.  We all fall victim to a gentle snow fall with hats, mittens and a cup of bouffant whipped cream on top of  steaming cocoa.  When was the last time you did that?   I am pretty sure you tear open a prepackaged dehydrated marshmallows concoction and add hot water.  Am I right?

The joyful celebration of just being able to hold a loved one.   Talk to a longtime friend whom you may see only occasionally, or to share a delicious meal that you have lovingly prepared is far more important than a station wagon full of gifts that are discarded by the new year.

I have been reminded again of how starved we all are of meaningful traditions.  Our family has a lovely tradition for Thanksgiving that we do.  I started this tradition in order to literally teach what Thanksgiving was all about to those at our table who had never experienced the holiday.  It is really quite simple.   I light a small candle and say what I am thankful for and I light the person’s candle next to me and they do their own thankful thing and we go around the table.   When people who customarily reject meaningful traditions that actually have them think and tug at their hearts, their reaction is to make snide remarks or tell jokes.  Only those who are uncomfortable with this type of inner celebration are uncomfortable.   The others sit in stunned wonder as to what has just happened and seem awkward and don’t know what to do next.   We also have something that we do at Christmas and on New Year’s Day.   All very unique.  All very our family.  All very special and meaningful.   I know I have said this many times before, but I will keep saying it again and again;  these are the very things which build strong families and strong relationships, just as mediocre things and no traditions leave families empty and they only have the frenzied hours, unmet expectations of what they thought would happen and a credit card debt which they reject, deplore and hate well past next August!

Too harsh?     I do not believe so.   It is probably more true than you suspect.

I see it and hear it in the voices of my clients all the time.   Once school starts there is a growing restlessness that begins and it gets to a fever pitch around the last Friday in November and then falls off of the cliff come December 1st.

Next time I will talk about how to know if you are fried or joyful.

I welcome your comments.



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